Are You Ready To Rise Above?
“People will never rise above their opinions of themselves”
– Peter Sage
Limiting beliefs can keep you stuck with past untruths. Have you always had a problem with mess and clutter? Then people started knowing you as the messy one or the cluttered one?
Then because you didn’t have it in you to change it became a self-fulfilling prophecy?
I was the sister with the clutter. You could not see my floor half the time. I have been working since I was 13 and I read a ton of books. Who had time to clean and tidy?
After I was married, we lived in one room at my grandmother’s and it was stuffed. We moved into a large 2-bedroom apartment, and it was crowded.
We moved into a townhouse, and it became crowded (a lot of that was the kids, the dogs, and my home daycare).
I was constantly selling stuff and decluttering, but it didn’t help, and I felt completely overwhelmed. Marriage issues, a sick father-in-law who lived with us and my anxiety were all factors in this overwhelm.
Our next house was a large, detached home with a finished basement and a pool. It was large enough that clutter was not an issue anymore. I started my business and wanted to help other moms who were going through similar things.
I changed my ways, but I was still clinging to a lot of things (mainly books).
I worked my business part-time for years helping others get a control on their mess. As my marriage fell apart, my anxiety became an all-time high and the only thing I felt I had control over was my home.
I kept up with the housework and was constantly giving things away on freecycle or Recycling Kindness groups.
When we realized it was better to go our separate ways, I found a townhome nearby that was about 1000 sq ft less. I started decluttering even more so that things would work in the new house.
I decided to buy new mattresses and a new couch (something I say to all my clients that are downsizing or divorcing).
My daughters listened to my ex who through the years also called me forms of a clutter bug and they would express those sentiments.
However, I had systems in place and so when it came time to clean up everything had a home, and it was much quicker.
Do I still pile things sometimes? Yes.
Can I deal with it quickly when I need to? Yes?
Honestly though it wasn’t until a few years ago that I finally wiped that personality trait off my psyche. I am no longer a clutter bug.
I haven’t been for many years, yet my brain would still go there. This is similar to when someone is overweight, and they get healthy and go down to a better weight for them. Yet they will always think they are overweight, and they think their friends will always label them as such (hopefully you have better friends than that).
This statement was so profound to me when I saw it on social media. For so many years I was a people pleaser. I hated for people (anyone) to be upset with me or my actions.
My anxiety caused me untold anguish into believing that people thought ill of me. I was worried about other people’s opinions of me and my life.
Meanwhile I did not have a high opinion of myself. Sure, I would receive accolades from clients, my daughters would say I was a great mom, my boyfriends would be impressed with so many of my qualities, my team would be happy to work for me.
Yet I was still not sure of myself and still had a low opinion and low self-esteem and confidence.
I know this is an internal thing but being called names and told you are not good enough for years dampens your spirit and keeps you weighed down.
It wasn’t until I went through different types of therapy and extinguished these limiting beliefs and realized that I was the only one that could make me happy, that huge changes started to happen inside of me.
I had someone say to me recently for years you have been an inspiration to so many people, yet it is only recently that you are inspired yourself.
I now have a high opinion of myself. I know I am unstoppable and amazing. Kind and funny and smart. Successful and loving and grateful. I am at peace with my life and who I am and who shares my life with me.
Do you have limiting beliefs or anxiety that keep you stuck in place?
Are you ready to rise above?
“People will never rise above their opinions of themselves” -Peter Sage